Rest In Peace Grandpa.
Although I never got meet you, please know I loved you
and I'm sorry that I never took the opportunity to come see you
especially when my father begged me to, EVERY summer.
How I wish I would've just taken that week off work, and flown to Jamaica...Fuck.
Here come the tears again...I know you'll never see this, but I have to put it somewhere...say it somewhere.
It 's so strange though, everytime I leave for school someone I care about dies..why is this you think?
I swear, if this shit happens again this year in September, I'm turning right around,
because I would LOVE to be with your son and grandson right now as they mourn
but I can't , because as you died, I was on a plane to Alberta, my fucking luck right?
God, how my dad needs me right now...what the hell am I doing here?
Speaking of God, I'm not mad at you, don't worry.
I'm just sad that I can't be with them. That this is how the peices have all fallen.
I know he will never hear me say any of this Lord, but I pray that somehow impressed upon him that I loved him and planned to see him, I just can't believe that I'm too late.
And I'll never get another opportunity to.
Well, if this is how you'll have it Lord than so be it.
can't turn back the clock, but I wish I could.
Or I wish you would.
Dear God, how am I supposed to move on from this?
How am I supposed to be strong, or keep a happy face?
I'll try Lord, but i'ma need your help....I don't want to break down in front of my friends.
Another thing lord, PLEASE strengthen my father right now..he 's new to this.
Please soften his heart, and allow him to lean on you.
Please, the devil is going to try to separate you two now Lord
and he's come SO far since his baptism...PLEASE impress it upon, and keep reminding him that you love him and want to comfort him in his time of need.
Please...for me...since I can't do it myself right now...
Amen.
I love you Grandpa, I'll see you one day.
